A Mallard, email

A MAN and his pet duck walk into a bar, both of them ready to tie one on. They start off slowly, drinking beer and munching nuts, but as the night wears on they progress to spirits, and then tequila shots. By the time the bartender announces last drinks, the man and his duck are blitzed, but the man demands: “One more for me, and one more for my duck.”

So the bartender pours the drinks and the man and the duck throw them back. Suddenly, the duck falls over dead. The man throws some money on the bar, puts on his coat and starts to leave.

The bartender says: “Hey man, you can’t just leave that lyin’ there!”

The man replies: “That’s not a lion, that’s a duck.”